Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . .

The ONLY site on the internet where everything is guaranteed to be completely WEIRD!!

<< Being weird on the Internet since 1848 >>

Utterly Weird

Weirdness

Jokes
Riddles

Poems

Stories

Pictures

Animals

Real or Fake?

Fashion

Videos

Philosophy

Cartoons

Anime

Rocky Horror

Urban Myths

Facts

Ugly People

Famous People

Auctions

Gadgets & Stuff

Names

Illusions

Webcams

Art

Quotes

Bits and Bobs

Strange Laws

Foods

Inventions

Weird Games

Humor Scripts

Photography

Limericks

Phobias

Proverbs & Sayings

Pull a Funny Face

Words

Graffiti

Face Paint Body Art

Top Song Lyrics

Movie Song Lyrics

Lyrics

Song Lyrics

Tattoos

Vintage Postcards

Wine Labels

World Population

FREE

DIET

PLANS

Google Ideas

 

Weird Websites - Weird Jokes - Probably the 100 best Computer Jokes in the world.

The Ultimate Computer give the ultimate answer

 

The Ultimate Computer stood at the end of the Ultimate Computer Company's production line. At which point the guided tour eventually arrived. The Ultimate Computer Company's top salesman stepped forward to give his prepared demonstration of the Ultimate Computer's abilities.
'This', he said, 'is the Ultimate Computer. It will give an intelligent answer to any question you may care to ask it'. Skeptical about the Ultimate Computer's abilities, one man from the tour named Smartass Sam stepped forward and spoke into the Ultimate Computer's microphone. 'Where is my father?' he asked. There was a whirring of wheels and flashing of lights (that the manufacturers always use to impress lay people), and then a *ding* as a little card popped out. On it were printed the words: 'Fishing off Florida'. Smartass Sam smirked and then laughed in smug satisfaction. 'Actually,', said Sam, 'my father is dead. Your Ultimate Computer is a flop!' It had been a trick question!! The salesman, carefully chosen for his ability to think fast on his feet, immediately replied that he was sorry the answer was unsatisfactory, but as computers were precise, perhaps he might care to rephrase his question and try again? Smartass Sam thought once more, went up to the Ultimate Computer and this time said into the microphone: 'Where is my mother's husband?' Again there was a whirring of wheels and a flashing of lights. And again there was a *ding* as the little card popped out. Printed on it were the words: 'Dead. But your father is still fishing off Florida'.

 

 

 

<< Now check out our Top 100 computer jokes >>

 

 

 

 

 

For more Weird Websites visit the Members Only section on the top menu.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Must Buy eBook

medusa myths beautiful girls gorgon

Amazon: 

USA: $0.99 UK: 0.70
Amazon USA

Amazon UK

Must Buy eBook

cat ebook funny

Amazon: 

USA:  $0.99 UK: 0.80
Amazon USA 

Amazon UK

Funny Books

Funny Books

Funny Books

Funny Books

scottish humour books

Funny Books

lazy sods guide to sex

Funny Books

funny chat room wind ups windups book
 

 

Note: Many of photos and other items on this site have been submitted by friends of the site. We try not to infringe copyright but if you do have copyright to any picture (or anything else) and wish it removed please contact the webmaster. webmaster(@)weird-websites.info