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A selection of hilarious one liner jokes and quotes - Probably the funniest one liner jokes and quotes on the Internet

Funny One Liners - 33

 

best one liner joke

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I 'had' any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!


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Funny joke

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?


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Bizarre one liner

If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.


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one liner quotes

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. (Robert Brault)


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sarcastic one liners

I don't need you, you know--I can be lonely all by myself.


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the best one liners

Failure is opportunity in disguise.


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one liners joke

There is never a right way to do the wrong thing.


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Silly one liner

The Greek words recorded in the Gospels when Jesus died, translated in English as 'It is finished' were the same words used in bills of sale and meant 'paid in full. (John Hoh)


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short one liners

If I had my life to live over I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace. (Erma Bombeck)


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clean short jokes

With money I can buy things; with thinking I can understand things.



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<< Note our one liner jokes have been submitted by a number of contributors - if you find anything that you think should not appear here please contact the webmaster >>

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Note: Many of photos and other items on this site have been submitted by friends of the site. We try not to infringe copyright but if you do have copyright to any picture (or anything else) and wish it removed please contact the webmaster. webmaster(@)weird-websites.info