Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . . Weird Websites. . .

The ONLY site on the internet where everything is guaranteed to be completely WEIRD!!

<< Being weird on the Internet since 1848 >>

Utterly Weird

Weirdness

Jokes
Riddles

Poems

Stories

Pictures

Animals

Real or Fake?

Fashion

Videos

Philosophy

Cartoons

Anime

Rocky Horror

Urban Myths

Facts

Ugly People

Famous People

Auctions

Gadgets & Stuff

Names

Illusions

Webcams

Art

Quotes

Bits and Bobs

Strange Laws

Foods

Inventions

Weird Games

Humor Scripts

Photography

Limericks

Phobias

Proverbs & Sayings

Pull a Funny Face

Words

Graffiti

Face Paint Body Art

Top Song Lyrics

Movie Song Lyrics

Lyrics

Song Lyrics

Tattoos

Vintage Postcards

Wine Labels

World Population

FREE

DIET

PLANS

Google Ideas

 

A random selection of hilarious jokes from our website - Probably the funniest jokes on the Internet

Random Jokes - 42

 





Driver: 'Hi, is your name Jello?'
Hitchhiker: 'Uh... no...'
Driver: 'Too bad... 'cause there's always room for Jello!'






It was a cold winter day. An old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice, dropped in his fishing line, and waited patiently for a bite. He was there for almost an hour, without even a nibble, when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice next to him. The young boy dropped his fishing line and minutes later he hooked a Largemouth Bass. The old man couldn't believe his eyes but chalked it up to plain luck. But, shortly thereafter, the young boy pulled in another large catch. The young boy kept catching fish after fish. Finally, the old man couldn't take it any longer. 'Son, I've been here for over an hour without even a nibble. You've been here only a few minutes and have caught a half dozen fish! How do you do it?' The boy responded, 'Roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm.' 'What was that?' the old man asked. Again the boy responded, 'Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm.' 'Look,' said the old man, 'I can't understand a word you're saying.' The boy spit the bait into his hand and said... 'You have to keep the worms warm!'



The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and has each of them try to catch it.

The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.

The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, filling everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.

The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten raccoon. The raccoon is yelling: 'Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!



John was furious when his steak arrived too rare.

'Waiter,' he shouted, 'Didn't you hear me say 'well done'?'

'I can't thank you enough, sir,' replied the waiter. 'I hardly ever
get a compliment.'



At a Milwaukee post office, a woman complained to the clerk that a Pony Express rider could get a letter from Milwaukee to St. Louis in two days, and now it takes three. 'Id like to know why,' she scoffed.

The clerk thought a moment and then suggested, 'The horses are a lot older now?'

 

 

<< Found these jokes funny? Now check out the 1000s of other hilarious jokes on our site. >>

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Must Buy eBook

medusa myths beautiful girls gorgon

Amazon: 

USA: $0.99 UK: 0.70
Amazon USA

Amazon UK

Must Buy eBook

cat ebook funny

Amazon: 

USA:  $0.99 UK: 0.80
Amazon USA 

Amazon UK

Funny Books

Funny Books

Funny Books

Funny Books

scottish humour books

Funny Books

lazy sods guide to sex

Funny Books

funny chat room wind ups windups book
 

 

Note: Many of photos and other items on this site have been submitted by friends of the site. We try not to infringe copyright but if you do have copyright to any picture (or anything else) and wish it removed please contact the webmaster. webmaster(@)weird-websites.info