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A selection of hilarious one liner jokes and quotes - Probably the funniest one liner jokes and quotes on the Internet

One Line Jokes - 3

 

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.


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If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cats.


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Don't eat vegetables because insects use them as their love pads, and who knows what kind of STDs They're carrying.


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Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.


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I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.


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When in doubt. . . mumble.


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The most important thing in the application development is the name. An application will not succeed without a good name. I have recently invented a very good name and now I am looking for a suitable application.


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Who gossips to you will gossip of you. (Turkish proverb)


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Dedication is not what others expect of you; it is what you can give to others.


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Show me a man who cannot bother to do little things, and I'll show you a man who cannot be trusted to do big things. (Bill Cosby)



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<< Now check out our 4000 other funny One - Liners - Yep, that's right we have over 4000 hilarious one liners to amuse and entertain you!!! >>

 

 

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<< Note our one liner jokes have been submitted by a number of contributors - if you find anything that you think should not appear here please contact the webmaster >>

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Note: Many of photos and other items on this site have been submitted by friends of the site. We try not to infringe copyright but if you do have copyright to any picture (or anything else) and wish it removed please contact the webmaster. webmaster(@)weird-websites.info