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A selection of hilarious one liner jokes and quotes - Probably the funniest one liner jokes and quotes on the Internet

Funny One Liners Collection - 24

 

He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe is as good as dead; his eyes are closed. (Albert Einstein)


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You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me and not you!


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I don't have burnout, but I'm slightly singed.


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Don't speak of secret matters in a field that is full of little hills. (Hebrew proverb)


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I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me. (Dave Barry)


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May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you are dead. (Irish proverb)


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Love is perhaps the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity. (Helen Hayes)


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In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life; it goes on.


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One good thing about being wrong is the joy it brings to others.


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Even in a pile of manure, a flower will grow.



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<< Now check out our 4000 other funny One - Liners - Yep, that's right we have over 4000 hilarious one liners to amuse and entertain you!!! >>

 

 

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<< Note our one liner jokes have been submitted by a number of contributors - if you find anything that you think should not appear here please contact the webmaster >>

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Note: Many of photos and other items on this site have been submitted by friends of the site. We try not to infringe copyright but if you do have copyright to any picture (or anything else) and wish it removed please contact the webmaster. webmaster(@)weird-websites.info