ELVIS SPOTTING IN NEW HAMPSHIRE
Residents of a small New Hampshire college town were
shocked to see an elderly man who bore a remarkable
resemblance to the late king of rock and roll, Elvis
Presley, perusing the bookshelves of the college
library. When approached, the man who gave his name as
Aaron Love, denied any connection with the king.
“People been telling me that for years, ma’am,” he told
the librarian, with a slight smile. “I don’t see any
resemblance myself.”
“It’s him,” screamed a sixty-nine year old woman, an
alum of the college, upon entering the building and
spotting Mr. Love. “Elvis, I’d know you any where!” She
started to maneuver her wheelchair in Mr. Love’s
direction, then stopped, overcome with emotion.
Is this really Elvis
Presley?
“The whole thing is just something caused by suspicious
minds,” Mr. Love assured everyone as they gathered
around him. “I’m just looking for a quiet, nice little
town to move to, with a little house for me and my hound
dog. I’m tired of living in the ghetto. I will admit a
certain fondness for Heartbreak Hotel, but I really
can’t afford to live there forever. I have spent some
time working on the jailhouse rock, got myself in a bit
of trouble; but now my heart’s singing an unchained
melody. I really love this town; it has me all shook
up.”
Mr. Love seemed unaware of the swiveling motion he made
with his hips as he spoke so eloquently.
“I know who you are,” insisted the sixty-nine year old
alum of the college, identified simply as Bunny. “I’d
know you anywhere. I’ve loved you tender for many
years.”
“Thank you for those kind words, young lady,” said Mr.
Love. “But I still think you have me mixed up with
someone else.”
“No,” insisted Bunny. “You’re always on my mind.”
Mr. Love leaned down and whispered in her ear.
“Let’s make it our secret little sister,” he said. “I
look at this town like the promised land.”
“Don’t cry Daddy,” said Bunny. “The wonder of you has me
speechless. But you are going to have to pay. I want to
know the whole story, where you’ve been all these years.
On this, I’m going to have things my way.”
“Little sister, you’re singing the mean woman blues,”
Mr. Love told her.
“It’s just that I have a burning love for you,” Bunny
replied. “I can’t get over the wonder of you.
Do things my way and there’ll be peace in the valley.”
“If I can dream of calling this town the green, green
grass of home, you’ve got yourself a deal, honey,” Mr.
Love told her. “Please don’t be cruel”
“I don’t think it’s too much to ask,” Bunny said.
“I don’t think it’s the impossible dream at all.”
Bunny assured everyone that she had been mistaken in her
earlier identification. “He definitely isn’t Elvis,” she
told everyone. “His nose isn’t right.”
“I’m just a simple guitar man,” Mr. Love told everyone.
“Not some one like Elvis who has known fame and
fortune.”
“Welcome to my world,” Bunny told Mr. Love with a smile.
“You’re just too much,” he replied.
Other Elvis Presley sightings:
Midget Elvis - spotted in
Houston
Elvis in ultra short skirt and
fish net stockings (Little Red Riding Hood Elvis) -
spotted in Pink Eagle Gay Bar London
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