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Weird Websites - Weird News Stories.  

Swine Flu Pandemic: Swine Flu can be transmitted by mobile phone

New research leaked from UK Government Health Offices on 29th September 2009 reveal the reason why swine flu has become pandemic so quickly - the micro organisms can evagualate - that is they can interact with bio, mechanical and elocto organisms. In effect they can make mechanical and electrical devices 'sick' in the same way they make humans and animals sick. What's even more worrying - they can spread through mechanical and electrical devices to humans.

Although the Health Secretary refuses to comment, Government insider, Doctor Blackmark-Selwin-Trops, has exclusively told Weird-Websites that the research carried out at a secret laboratory on Iona, Scotland has proven that the bacteria has mutated to an advanced state not considered possible. He said, "After six months of experimentation we suddenly realised that we were dealing with something different. Something completely different. Volunteers who were in quarantine were suddenly contracting Swine Flu. This bugged us for a while - then we had a breakthrough - we studied one of our volunteers mobile phones - it had all the symptoms of Swine Flu - it wad caught the bug from another phone that was hundreds of miles away."

Although the British Government do not want to create mass panic, it is thought that before the end of the year they will ban the use of mobile phones except in emergencies.

Robert Sole had this to say, "Bloody Awful! Yet another danger using mobiles and what doe the bleeding government go and do? Nothing! Blinking nothing! I could have done nothing myself - I'm good at doing nothing. But you expect the government to bleeding well do something to fix the problem. It's time they created a law or something to stop this blinking Swine Flu - but they're to darn busy claiming expenses for their moats - useless bloody lot that what I say - that's what I always say."

Cardinal Syne, spokesman for the Catholic Church, Maryhill Sub-Branch said, "It is an evil act against God to use mobile phones. This is the first sign of his punishment - soon he will release a torrent of rage which will destroy mankind and his evil mobile phone."

More on this story as it develops. 

 

Pictures of the swine flu bacteria magnified 10,000 times reveal that they look exactly like normal pigs. swine flu germs pigs

 

A mobile phone with Swine Flu

A mobile phone with Swine Flu

Swine Flu Symptoms
* unusual tiredness,

* completely bored with sex,
* headache,
* runny nose,
* sore throat,
* shortness of breath or cough,
* loss of appetite,

* can't be arsed going to the pub,
* aching muscles,
* diarrhoea or vomiting.

 

 

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