Woman Wakes Up to Find Herself Turned Into a Mermaid. Where Will It Stop She Asks.

Marilyn Anders has never been particularly fond of swimming, therefore she was surprised and quite horrified to wake up this past Tuesday morning and find that not only was she unable to climb out of bed, but she had no feet upon which to stand. Marilyn’s legs from the knees down had turned into some sort of flippers. Marilyn finds her self craving liquids to drink, particularly diet cola, however contrary to what might have been expected, given what we’ve read in science fiction accounts, she seems to have no desire whatsoever to immerse herself in water.
“I don’t have a particular aversion to it,” she told reporters, who, upon hearing of this particular phenomena had shown up at the Anders’ home, hoping to find out more information upon this unheard of occurrence. “It’s just that I don’t desire to be in it any more or any less than I ever did.”

Marilyn turns into a mermaid

“My thoughts are that it has to be some sort of a skin disorder, perhaps something akin to the ohmygodwhatisheppening which Ms. Anders’ experiences,” said Dr. Rodney Reign, who examined Ms. Anders when a hysterical call from her husband to 911 caused her to be brought into the emergency room of a local hospital. “It is well known that ohmygodwhatisheppening often causes its victims to develop what have up until now been regarded as ulcers but may rather be something akin to the Costa infestations often experienced by fish. This theory is given additional credence by the fact that suffers of ohmygodwhatisheppening often have an infestation of scaly white patches on their skin, quite similar to the Ichthyophthirius, more commonly know as Ich, which often invades fish tanks.”

A random fish picture for those who don't know what a fish looks like.

Nurse Tammy Beckford, who often assists Dr. Reign on his more unusual cases, was dispatched to a local pet store to purchase products such as Forma-Green or Acriflavine Neutral which are often used on fish which suffer from this particular disease. Dr. Reign was reluctant to prescribe these particular medications,” Nurse Beckford told reporters. “We just don’t know if insurance companies will honor these prescriptions are not, especially since they aren’t filled by pharmacies. We tried contacting local pharmacies to see if they knew of any sort of medications similar to these that are used for humans, but none of them had anything remotely similar nor did they carry the ingredients to put something similar together.”
“We just prescribe for people, not for animals,” said one local pharmacist. “We’ve never had a call for a medication of this sort before.”

A woman who did not turn into a mermaid

“We are in hopes that we have caught this unusual condition in time to stop it from developing any further,” said Dr. Reign. “I have put in a call to the local veterinarian in hopes that he may be able to act as a specialist consultant in this case. I further more hope that in time we will find something that will cause this disorder to reverse itself and we will be able to restore Ms. Anders lower legs and feet to her.”

William Anders, Ms. Anders husband of some seven years spoke briefly with the media. “I want to thank you all for the interest and caring you have shown concerning my wife’s unusual disorder,” he told everyone. “I love my wife very much and this will in no way upset our marriage. My wife is greatly concerned that this will not stop with turning her into a mermaid but will continue until she has completely turned into a fish. As you can imagine, her emotional condition is quite sensitive at this time. We ask that you continue with your prayers and your loving thoughts. Although I love my wife and nothing will ever change that, I much prefer her as a flesh and blood woman rather than as a cold fish.”
 

Marilyn has made a full recovery

Story by our news reporter Gail McLeod - Working for Independence

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