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Our database of over 500 short poems - possibly the funniest five hundred short poems on the internet

Short Funny Poetry Collection - 2


I' am by Amanda Edwards

I am

Sarcastically funny

Cynically sweet

Blonde with brains

Brutally honest

All for A.R.A.

Wise but young

Christianity Wiccan mix

Scared but strong

Romantically incorrect

Forever scarred

But not broken

Loving life

Sometimes I forget why

Respectful to originality

An ambitious procrastinator

Afraid of heights

But love to fly

Shyly outrageous

Heartbroken but hopeful

Courageously afraid

Oddly angelic

Never a fad

Sometimes glad

Sometimes mad

Always real

= = = = = = = = = =

Spidery Foe by Gareth Lancaster

There's a spider spinning webs,
From the ceiling to my bed.
It's a silky trick,
He's working quick,
Whilst swinging on his thread.

He's moving with intent,
As he hurries his descent.
He sways around,
Above the ground,
He's here to cause torment!

His yarn he does unwind,
As my teeth begin to grind.
My spidery foe,
Is near my toe,
And then I'll be entwined!

Now an inch is all that's clear,
'Tween the spider and my ear.
I turn his way,
And slowing say,
'Boo!' as he gets near!

The spider, shocked, clings tight,
As his balance goes with fright.
He speeds up high,
I wave bye-bye,
Till we meet again tonight !

= = = = = = = = = =

Snails by Gareth Lancaster

Slimy and slippery,
Snails are such fun.
Slowly they move,
They can't even run!

Leaving their trail
Behind as they go.
You can see where they've been
And how very slow.

On their back is a shell,
It's really their home.
It's ever so small,
But it goes where they roam.

On stalks are their eyes,
That wave all around.
One can point up,
And one to the ground!

They eat lots of plants,
And all of the flowers.
Munching away,
Especially in showers.

Shiny and slippery,
Snails are such fun.
They eat and they eat,
They must weight a ton!

= = = = = = = = = =

The Sticky Sticker by Gareth Lancaster

I stuck a sticker on my nose,
And now it won't come off!
The sticky glue won't let it move,
Not even when I cough!

I've tried to pull the sticker hard,
But cannot make it budge!
So now the sticker interferes,
And stops me eating fudge!

The glue that holds it on so tight,
Is tough and mighty strong!
And by mistake just yesterday,
It also snared my tongue!

But now to make my plight complete,
My finger just got stuck!
You know I shouldn't pick my nose,
I really am a schmuck!




<< Now check out our 500 other funny short poems >>


More Short Poems


More Poems


Funny poems from No' Rabbie Burns



<< Note our poems and pictures have been submitted by a number of contributors - if you find anything that you think should not appear here please contact the webmaster >>





















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Note: Many of photos and other items on this site have been submitted by friends of the site. We try not to infringe copyright but if you do have copyright to any picture (or anything else) and wish it removed please contact the webmaster. webmaster(@)