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Our database of over 500 short poems - possibly the funniest five hundred short poems on the internet

Short easy to read poetry - 16


The Angry Dinosaur by Gareth Lancaster

A huge obnoxious dinosaur,
Just barged its way through our front door!
It didn't knock or ring the bell,
Just crashed right in to where we dwell!
It snarled and snorted 'cross the hall,
Stood on (and burst!) my brand new ball.
It shook the paintings off their hooks,
And threw my dad some evil looks!
It tramped right in to our front room,
And left a smelly stench of doom!
It circled round and round the chairs,
Whilst we all stood and said our prayers!
With creaking weight it then sat down,
The chair collapsed, my mum did frown.
The dinosaur with eyes bright red,
Then slowly turned its ugly head!
'I've had enough,' it gave a growl,
It sighed and sank, its face a scowl.
'I really tried! I'm in distress!
I didn't win the fancy dress!'

= = = = = = = = = =

I'm Getting Sick of Peanut Butter by Kenn Nesbitt

I look inside my lunch box,
and, oh, what do I see?
A peanut butter sandwich
staring glumly back at me.

I know I had one yesterday,
and, yes, the day before.
In fact, that's all I've eaten
for at least a month or more.

I'm sure tomorrow afternoon
the outlook's just as bleak.
I'll bet I'm having peanut butter
every day this week.

I'm getting sick of peanut butter
sandwiches for lunch.
Why can't I have baloney
or potato chips to munch?

I wish I had lasagna
or a piece of pumpkin pie.
Another day of peanut butter
might just make me cry.

But still this awful sandwich
is in every lunch I take.
You see, it is the only thing
that I know how to make.

= = = = = = = = = =

Money by Gareth Lancaster

If I had lots of money
I would just eat milk and honey
And never once would clean my teeth.

If I had lots of cash
I would throw a great big bash
And just invite my closest friends.

If I had lots of spend
All my toys I could mend
Especially the ones I like the best.

If I had lots to use
You would see me on the news
As I gave it away to everyone.

So if I had lots of money
I think it might be funny
And I would make sure everybody laughed!

= = = = = = = = = =

The Ghost and the Darkness by Donna M. Connelly

Within the darkest of dungeons
And much to my chagrin
I found an empty passageway
Except for a ghost within
He looked at me, excitedly
He danced about the hall
He stopped and glared into my eyes
I could not help, but fall.
I was fearful, almost tearful
of what I cannot explain
A sound was coming toward me
The sound of a rattling chain.
The ghost was advancing toward me
Swaying about his stance
He smiled at me and then he said
May I have this dance?
I could not help but wonder
Why he asked me this
But when I stood to dance with him
He said he only wanted a kiss.
I heard that chain still rattling
I heard a moan come from above
I didn't want to kiss the ghost
Until he called me his Ladylove
This ghost of darkness, how could it be
That he could make me feel
A love that I have never felt
And have it feel so real
He leaped at me, but faltered
He could not stand upon his feet
For he didn't have any there, you see
He was nothing but a sheet.




<< Now check out our 500 other funny short poems >>


More Short Poems


More Poems


Funny poems from No' Rabbie Burns



<< Note our poems and pictures have been submitted by a number of contributors - if you find anything that you think should not appear here please contact the webmaster >>





















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